2001-09-20 - 11:37 a.m.
i only wanted to hear his voice.
calling me to whisper 'stuff'...
just like everyone else...
like heather right now...on the phone with her boy. i'm sure he's doing his best to flirt with her...i can hear her laughing...that silly girl laugh...i havent laughed like that in so long.
i cant even remember...
i only wanted to hear his voice because i saw something in him...in someone i didnt even know...and i fell for it. my fault. my bad. stupid to begin with i guess, what was i thinking?
it was a long shot and i took the gamble...and in perfect jamie fashion i lost. plain and simple.
because i hoped when there wasnt any hope. because i thought maybe this time he'd see what no one else saw...what no one else too the time to look for.
dont knowwhy i thought it would be different..he prolly thinks i'm "soo cool" or "an awesome person"
but i dreampt about him last night...someone i dont even know.
and i'm sure there were other girls running through HIS dreams...other girls not me. it's so painfully obvious.
painfully obvious.
i just wanted something different.
wanted a voice on the other end of the phone so i could laugh that laugh again...
wanted someone to try their damndest to get that laugh outta me.
~J
